The summer after my brother died, something deep within me learned the power of adjusting the aperture of my awareness. Keeping my metaphorical lens as small as possible helped me realize that - moment to moment - I was OK. This same strategy is helping me to feel more settled and calm in the wake of the national and global chaos of the last months.
I've always been in awe of people who can fix things and make things. Until this week IKEA shelves were the extent of my handy-ness. But now I know how to use an orbital sander and - it surprises me as I bet it will surprise you - I have brand new mindfulness practice to help keep me in the present moment.
In the face of the hugeness and mystery of the Grand Canyon, I experienced the relief of surrendering to the unknown. Could I learn to receive my real-life moments “at the edge” with even a smidge of the wonder and awe that I felt on the edge of the Grand Canyon? I really hope so.
At a dear friend's funeral, listening to the remembrances made me realize how very many people she had impacted through her relatively quiet life. What if - on days when we're feeling small and a little insignificant - we could remember this? That we matter? That the world is a better place because we're in it? That would be a wonderful way to honor my friend's life.
I hate messing up. I hate it even more when I "get caught" making a mistake. I hate it most of all when my mistakes splash on others. Yet making mistakes seems to be an essential part of the human journey. In fact, mistakes are not obstacles on our journey to becoming good people. They ARE the journey to becoming better people.
I don't know why the human mind allows the negative to overshadow the positive, but it does. Especially in times like ours, we need to cultivate the habit of paying attention to even the tiniest good things in our lives. Doing so gives us the resilience to put our best foot forward no matter what is going on in the world around us.
My daughter planned a ski weekend for her birthday and we were thrilled to be invited. Yet I wimped out and chose not to go skiing. When I made my choice, I thought my fear of falling and hurting myself was keeping me safe - but it was really holding me back. Now that I understand this, I have to figure out how to choose differently next time.
Resilience is not about going back to the way we were before. It’s about moving forward as the person you’ve become because you’ve navigated something difficult and allowed it to form you into someone new, someone a touch wiser, someone slightly more evolved, someone filled with a little more humility and a little less fear.
Am I alone in thinking the world is a lot right now? It is natural to feel helpless in the face of the world's needs. An old story from the Talmud reminds us that if we each do our tiny, little bit, it is good and it is enough.