This summer I find that rather than yearning for amazing experiences, I am most looking forward to embracing the chance to exhale and relax into my ordinary life. There is something very settling about doing simple things that I can watch unfold over weeks and months.
I recently turned 59. Realizing that my last 3 years-that-ended-with-nine contained significant life milestones caused me to panic for a second. Then I thought, "What if enjoying being 59 is enough? That way this will be a darn good year no matter what does or does not happen."
The summer after my brother died, something deep within me learned the power of adjusting the aperture of my awareness. Keeping my metaphorical lens as small as possible helped me realize that - moment to moment - I was OK. This same strategy is helping me to feel more settled and calm in the wake of the national and global chaos of the last months.
I've always been in awe of people who can fix things and make things. Until this week IKEA shelves were the extent of my handy-ness. But now I know how to use an orbital sander and - it surprises me as I bet it will surprise you - I have brand new mindfulness practice to help keep me in the present moment.
My first real trip was a sprint through Europe. I've learned over time that a more leisurely pace allows my travels to change me - which is all to say that the old adage might be right. It's not the destination but the journey itself that matters.
You and I will never not be distracted. This world will always be filled with too many wonderful and ridiculous distractions. But we can minimize the distractions we create for ourselves. Doing so, even for a moment, makes us feel centered and serene. It makes us feel “all in” - with nowhere else we’d rather be and nothing else we’d rather be doing.
I would have said that I'd gotten pretty good at catching myself when I'm beating myself up. Surprise! As we get better and better at practicing kindness or non-violence, the ways that we're mean to ourselves can get trickier and trickier to notice.
Many of my students wonder if the still mind promised by yoga would be boring. It's a fair question. After all, everything feeling we have - from happy dances to the exhaustion of grief - makes life worth living. So I promise them (and you) that yoga doesn't eliminate feelings, but it will calm those all-consuming feelings that steal us away from the moment and from our ability to be our best selves.
My dogs are always 100% curious and excited to discover what is on the other side of any gate - even one we walk through every day. They might be onto something. Ask yourself - what if I did not assume I know what is going to happen next? What if I gave myself the thrilling space to wonder and to be surprised? Couldn’t that help us to savor every moment of these precious lives of ours?